Seeing in a new way

I was reading the other morning and I thought ‘hello, what’s happened to the writing?’ I couldn’t understand where the words in the middle of the page had disappeared to. Then I remembered that this had happened before. That sounds like the line out of a film. ‘It had all happened before, and it would all happen again.’ What movie is that from? Yes, all you clever lot out there it’s JM Barrie in Peter Pan echoing the, Bible the book of Ecclesiastes. I think it’s also been used in Battlestar Galactica among other movies and series. So, had my eyes become youthful, childlike, like Peter Pan? No that’s not what I’m saying. I remembered that ten years ago I kept losing the central vision in my right eye. The GP I had at the time recognised it an ocular migraine. I was put on medication that has stopped the problem for ten years; it seems to be back.

The loss of vision lasted about an hour, then it went. That’s good I thought, until a bright shining light appeared across my right eye. It was brighter and more vibrant than any visual migraine light shows I have ever had before. I honestly thought that there was some sort of light sabre being waved around in front of me. Now I’m onto Star Wars; is this a movie trivia blog, I hear you say; no, I reply. The light was just so distinct and bright it reminded me of a light sabre. Although unlike a light sabre it had sparking colours at the edges. Ah the joys of a visual migraines.

For anyone unfamiliar with ocular migraines and who might confuse them with migraine auras let me quickly explain. An ocular migraine is where you get a series of visual disturbances caused by blood vessel constriction in the eye itself. A migraine aura is where blood vessel constriction in the brain cause a series of problems which make you hypersensitive to light, smell, touch and then leads onto excruciating pain. You can also get visual disturbances. I was therefore hoping these visual disturbances were an ocular migraine and not an aura, warning of imminent pain.

There was a point when I started this. My vision loss was central, looking straight at the page of writing I couldn’t read anything. But I could move my eyes to one side and use peripheral vision. That way I could just about read, albeit blurry. Of course I could have just used my good eye, but I don’t see well with one eye. It got me thinking sometimes we need to look at problems indirectly. Instead of staring at them head on so hard that we lose sight of the issue. We need to look to one side. Allow our minds to go into idle perhaps. Don’t focus on the problem, look to one side. One definite result will be a lowering of your stress level. Sometimes a result can be seeing a new way forward. It’s just a thought if you are struggling with an irresolvable problem. I speak from experience here.

Just to round off I didn’t get a full-blown migraine. It was only an ocular migraine. At least it got me thinking.

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Author: Mike Nevin

I decided to write about the funny side of being cared for. I am a full time wheelchair user with daily carers. It's my experiences with my carers that inspired this blog.

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